In the next few days, our youngest son will turn three years old.
That would conclude that both my wife and I had 6 years of parenting experience since the start of the newly “disrupted” born era in our family.
This comes at a frightening blistering pace given it feels like it was only yesterday that he was a newborn baby, learning to crawl and unable to mumble and utter a single word out of his mouth.
Some days felt incredibly long, especially when we have to continuously change his diapers, fed him through the rigorous lunch and dinner hours and also having to deal with occasional illness such as flu ad fever.
Crazily lots of money have been spent on baby wipes, diapers, helpers, milk powders, books, schools, extra curriculum and entertainment and those are monies that will send us straight to FI had we chose not to have them.
Both my wife and I always had conversations how we wish we could forward time to when he is a little older and a bit more independent so we don’t have to be on the mercy of slavery all the time.
But years have gone by and it seems incredibly short to relish back on those memories.
This year, he attended his first school for pre-nursery which would have given him a chance to socialize and interact with the others, forming his own boundaries of friends and social network and learning how to cope with the everyday things. He is still crying after the 2nd week in school but he’s learning how to cope better with it now. Eventually, we know that the tears would go away with maturity and the growing up over time.
Often, parents don’t realize the amount of real time they are spending with their children because first they are so busy outside working and having their own agendas going out with colleagues and friends and second, they assume the kids will grow up anyway and time spent on kids are never quantifiable by either monetary or personal satisfaction value.
As much as I had often advocate my personal values and take on financial independence on this blog, it is also very much at the end of the objectives to be able to substitute those times used for earning more money to spending more quality time with my families.
I am a strong believer of time that we spent with our families is a pillar support of how we are going to embrace love, kindness and strength at the face of adversity. We are after all a human being and it is important to connect these emotional dots so that the people around us can feel secure and confident about themselves.
It takes time to create and maintain relationships with anyone in this world.
Similarly as parents, we need to take time to cater to our kids’ needs.
Every minute and every activities that we do with our kids are memories that will be stored and embraced in their hearts, just as how my parents did the same for me when I was young.
Growing up can be challenging and adolescence difficult at times and as parents sometime we can share our weakest moment too with them – our failures and consequences so they are being made aware of it.
While both our kids are different opposite characters, they both have strong willed characters and probably in due time they are likely to run faster than my wife and I at some point. In those moments, we want to be sure that they are running on the right path and values that we create for them even though those paths may be different.
6 years of our career can be easily quantified by the amount of salary increment or promotions we are getting to check and see if we are on the right path.
6 years of parenting – how do you quantify those successes?
Thanks for reading.